Paul Davis is not Sam Brownback

From F5:

by Don Winsor

August 7, 2014

As the Kansas gubernatorial race heats up in advance of the unelection of Gov. Sam Brownback, Sen. Paul Davis' popularity has risen dramatically since his campaign adopted the slogan, "Hey! I'm not Sam Brownback," which leads voters to believe that Davis is not, in fact, Gov. Sam Brownback.

"We made a strong effort to build support based on our stance on important social and economic issues," said Clayton Endicott III, a Davis representative. "In modern media it's important to have a platform that can be stated in 140 characters or less. 'Hey! I'm not Sam Brownback' has very few characters and leaves a lot of room per tweet for all of this hashtag this hashtag that hullabaloo so enjoyed by youth today."

Davis has spent years garnering grassroots support, building his campaign war chest through thousands of small, individual donations from actual voters. Brownback's campaign, on the other hand, owes its financial condition to a small number of large donations from wealthy individual and corporate donors. Now, through a series of targeted ads and emails, Davis' PR has taken a huge leap forward with the release of a number of simple statements which seem to clarify the only message people need to hear.

"People hear that he is not Sam Brownback, and they really respond to that idea. We're also trying to communicate our, 'The Economy Should Be Better,' and 'The Opposite Of What He Said,' agendas, with the 'he' meaning the current governor, Sam Brownback."

Brownback recently made history by having a historic number of high-profile members of his own party express support for his opponent, so the message seems to be getting through. While many other potential candidates are also not Brownback, Davis' team of political spin doctors were first to capitalize on the fact and assert that Davis is at least 2.5% less Brownback than anyone else who has considered running.

A recent poll by F5 and The National Association of Responsible Zookeepers puts Davis ahead of Brownback by at least 73% amongst eligible voters who are aware that Davis is not Brownback and by a comfortable margin amongst other voters.

Mr. Endicott, III, confidently explained the new approach in a historical perspective. "Davis' candidacy would likely be strong in any given election year. During most elections, however, there would be far less significance to his not being Sam Brownback. Were he running against a Mike Hayden or a Richard Simmons, not being Sam Brownback would be beneficial but of limited significance. We are fortunate to be running at this moment in history, when not being Sam Brownback is probably the single most important issue in getting elected."

"I just assumed Paul Davis was, in some form, Sam Brownback," explained Dr. Biff Tannen, a Derby pediatrician. "Knowing that he is a different person certainly makes the choice a great deal easier."

Some reports have appeared online that call into question the veracity of Davis' non-Brownbackism, with some pundits claiming that Davis is, in fact, simply a sophisticated android being operated remotely by the governor. These reports were widely dismissed, due to the fact that, if Kansas had access to that sort of advanced technology, the state's economy would less resemble a Mad Max film.

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